


Not In A Long Time

by TalesOfOnyxBats



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Recovery, Soft Azula (Avatar)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-19 08:47:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29623692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TalesOfOnyxBats/pseuds/TalesOfOnyxBats
Summary: Prompt: Forbidden LovePair: Azula/SongSummary: Azula has forbidden herself from love but Song is a very comforting and loving woman.
Relationships: Azula/Song (Avatar)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 16
Collections: 2021 Avatar Pro-Shipping Rare Pair Challenge





	Not In A Long Time

Azula traces her fingers over the line work of the woman’s scars. “A long time ago.” She mumbles softly, “I got that a long time ago. During a Fire Nation raid.” And that’s just it, that’s the problem entirely; Azula is a Fire National and a Fire National has no business with an earthbender. Yet, when Song lays back, Azula finds herself getting cozy next to the woman. And then she finds herself nuzzling her cheek against the woman’s chest. Song stokes her hair with such tender and affectionate hands. 

She could cry. 

She does shed a few tears.

Song furrows her brows and wipes the tear away with her thumb. “What’s wrong?”

She isn’t sure. 

She doesn’t think that there is anything wrong. 

In fact, she thinks that she is happy?

She doesn’t know how to explain it.

She opens her mouth and closes it again. “I don’t know, Song. Something is wrong with me.” She tries to work it out in her head. “I’m not sad.” She says softly. She squeezes Song’s hand and the woman gives her forehead a little kiss. A fluttering swells in her belly but it isn’t in any regard unpleasant. “I’m...happy?” 

Song smiles softly at her. She allows the span of a breath or two before asking, “has anyone ever held you before?” 

Azula shakes her head. “Not in a long time.”

“You like being held, don’t you.” 

Azula nods, “very much.” She doesn’t know why she is crying. She isn’t sad, truly she isn’t. Song sits up and pulls her close. No one has ever held her so tightly. So lovingly. No one has rested their chin on her head and rubbed her back. No one until now. 

Song wipes the tears from her cheeks. “Have you ever been this happy?” 

“Not in a  _ very  _ long time.”

She doesn’t think that she has allowed herself to be. She has forbidden herself from it. She has forbidden herself from a lot of things. From getting too close to the throne, from getting attached to any one person, from making friends, from love. 

Mostly she has forbidden herself from love. 

She isn’t sure that she deserves any of these things. And even if she does, she is terrified to have them because she can lose them. She can lose them just like she had lost everything before. 

Even still…

She stares at her hand in Song’s. She thinks that it fits nicely there. That it should stay there. She very much would like it to because it makes her happy. She is happy. She is afraid to be happy. 

Song caresses her cheeks, “it’s overwhelming, isn’t it?” She asks. 

Overwhelming. 

That is a good way of putting it. 

Azula, so very quietly that she doesn’t even hear herself whispers, “yes.” She isn’t sure how the hell Song had heard her. But she chuckles. Chuckles and strokes her cheek. 

“You should allow yourself to be happy.” 

Azula weaves her fingers between Song’s. She knows that she shouldn’t. She promised herself that she wouldn’t. But she has to, Agni she has to. Because it makes her feel alive. It makes her feel exhilarated. 

Song kisses her nose. 

Maybe it is time to forgive herself. To allow herself to love someone. Someone who she has no history with. Someone who has never feared her. Someone who has only known the person that she has fought so painstakingly to become. 

“I...yes, maybe…” 

Song smiles again. She tucks Azula’s bangs behind her ear and presses her forehead against hers. “You don’t have to be afraid of being happy...or loved.” 

Azula swallows. Song takes her had again and presses it to her chest. She can feel her own heartbeat, somewhat quickened, beneath it. Sometimes it is nice to be reminded that she has one after so many years of being told otherwise. After so many years of trying to pretend like she doesn’t. After so many years of trying to shut it out.

And maybe Song is right. Maybe it is time to be loved and loving. Maybe she will allow herself this. Will allow herself a real chance to heal in full instead of coping with the wounds. She takes another deep breath and motions for Song to lay back again. She makes herself cozy nestled up against her. And when she relaxes herself enough, she kisses the crook of Song’s neck. It is the first time she has done the kissing. And, Agni, she hopes that it won’t be the last. Song scooches closer, hugs her tighter. 

Somehow she is certain that it won’t be the last time. 


End file.
